Dreaming


Really wanna go there for the Holidays, but the flight tickets are really expensive then...5000:- plus. (in my opinion it's a little too much) I can't afford that...(cause i'd be paying my own ticket but also Jason's...) I don't wanna celebrate Christmas at home anymore...cause it's not really home anyway, and it's not gonna be the same now after the divorce. We always had our traditions...grandma' and grandpa' always comes over, we set up a frikkin' christmas buffé table in our kitchen...But now...dad doesn't live here anymore, and I highly doubt that his parents are gonna come over here anyway...or dad for that matter. so, we're just not gonna celebrate Christmas together like in the passed.
So, I think celebrating it with my "new" family, Jason's would be cool,
I've already gone thru some huge changes, so this would be a good change as well...new people, new energy. I absolutely adore Jason's mom, and her husband Paul is cool, and their family is just really really nice to you and everybody...

Jason wants to get the hell out the house, and I don't blame him...it sucks most of the time. it's far away from everything and the house is filled with bitterness. BUT also, there is NO JOBS in Uppsala. I feel sorry for Jason that's without a job, he's not used to it, and it's stressin' him out. So maybe moving to the states would be a good idea in the future? he could get a job easier and I already have the language so maybe I could get a job as well fairly easy, i'll take anything, as long as it doesn't involve poop or someting disgusting like that, haha. I could be a TEMP girl. I would not have a problem with that. Oh my god, it would be a huge difference to how I live and have been living my whole life!! I'd live so close to New York city!! and so close to other goodies! and I could practise my english more, and get to know new people...and most importantly be with Jason and his family...and see him glow! I know he'd be so happy to be back in Jersey...

So, i bettery apply for that green card as soon as possible cause the waiting list is long i bet.

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